P31 Challenge: Day 21

Can you believe it's been over 3 weeks that we started this?!!?!?

It has flown by for me. It's been a really exciting journey. I have felt God through it, and it couldn't have come at a better time in my life. Here are a few things I have learned:

1. Don't be lazy- It will set an overall tone of frustration and sluggishness for my home.
2. Be Selfless- Continue to put others first and God will give me the rest that I need from it all.
3. Keep Writing- (personal) The more I write, as with anything, the easier it becomes. I think there's been a significant improvement.
4. Trust God. Honestly He's been telling me this for a long time. Every time I feel frustrated or upset because it feels like we (as a family) are not moving forward, God reverts back to this. Obviously it's really hard for me or we wouldn't still be working on it.. but here we are.
5. Spend time with God everyday- I won't say that since we started, everything has been just peachy. I will say that I have felt more grace and peace and joy within myself and my home by taking the time to delve into the word, and to share it with others. It has brought a lot of fulfillment.

I am so happy for those of you who have stuck with it here. I know I can seem a little scatter-brained. I have 2 little ones, it comes with the territory. In all honesty, though, thank you for reading. It's really encouraging to log on and see that people are getting something out of this. You ladies are awesome in all of your unique ways! I know that whatever you take from this will only increase your life. Not because 'I'm such a great writer..' but because it's God's word and it's value never depreciates.

So... are you ready for the last verse?

³¹ Honor her for all that her hands have done,
   and let her works bring her praise at the city gate.

Today, I want to pray this over each of you.

May everything you put your hands to, be it child rearing, selling goods, working outside the home, or assisting others, I pray God blesses it. May the work you do never go unnoticed by the LORD Almighty. I ask that he would always bring you the rest that you need and the strength in the meantime. 

Help her to find her place in your Kingdom, show her the things in her life that will bring her satisfaction and success. And bless it abundantly. And Please, God, continue to strengthen these families. May these women be pillars in the homes, Queens in your Kingdom and a vessel for your wisdom. Amen. 

Sad to see a journey end, but also exciting. I don't know what comes next, but I do know he's got great things for each of us. 

Whatever it is, I know now that we are Proverbs 31 Women. 

And we know what that actually means :) 

With all my love and anticipation for the future-

Lindsay 

P31 Challenge: Day 20

My numbering has been off a little. Week 1 I counted our day off as day 7, Week 2 I picked up where we left off, and then I intended on counting Sunday as day 18, but then titled yesterday as day 18... I need to get it together here. So I could go in and count last sunday as day (13/ 14..) and today would be our last day. But I'm not. I want to break the last 2 verses into 2 days, so that's what I'm going to do. I did change yesterday's title to Day 19, so no, you are not going nuts!

As a reminder, this is all part of my journey and development as a writer. I never claimed I would be perfectly organized, so bear with me, please.

³⁰ Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting;
   but a woman who fears the LORD is to be praised. 

Because this is near the end of the passage, I feel that Lemuel's mother is trying to sum up these lessons for her son. She's going back into what she initially said, 

³ Do not spend your strength^[a] on women,
   your vigor on those who ruin kings.

When I think of a woman obsessed with her beauty, or eloquently charming, I see a very selfish person. 

Selfish people can be really draining. Everything they talk about requires you putting your full attention on them. They ask your advice, but then throw it out the window when it doesn't suit them. Imagine a young ruler falling in love with a woman like that. It would be completely destructive, not only to his life, but to the entire kingdom he was in charge of. 

When we get around selfish people, we start acting that way, too. It starts off wanting to fit in or relate to them, but soon it turns into a survival tactic. "If I'm not receiving love from this person, I'm going to have to love myself." Pretty soon, it's an explosive environment. Anything you say or do, can and will be used against you. How can you possibly have the best interest of someone else in mind, while living in that emotional place? 

The Kings of our households deserve to govern with wisdom and compassion. There are children that need loving instruction. There are finances that need to be handled with integrity. There are tasks outside of the home that he needs to have the confidence to execute. 

We have to stop trying to persuade our husbands with our beauty and our words. It only works for a season and then things come crashing down.


"A woman who fears the Lord is to be praised." Another word for "fear" is "revere." 

Reverence can be an outward expression of our respect. 

Why are these two thoughts coupled together, here? I think she is trying to say, "don't be a woman that tries to change her husband by manipulating him with charm, or by seducing him with your beauty. Be a woman that has reverence for God's position in his life." We seriously overstep boundaries when we try to do God's job. It is the thing that has wounded the church for so many years; When we set rules and standards, and impress them upon people, without letting the Spirit convict. We, as wives, have a responsibility to step back and trust God to work things out in these men. 

He is exceedingly capable and will do it. If you have a hard time believing that, check this out: 

Philippians 1:6 

So bite your tongue and take it up with God. Pray for your Husband. And listen to God, because I cannot count how many times I take an issue I'm having with another person (not just Allen, but yes, sometimes) and He will immediately show me something that I am doing to add fuel to the fire. A lot of times He will tell me I have it completely wrong all-together. 

Building our Kingdom, not tearing it down-

Lindsay

P31 Challenge: Day 19

Hey P31 Ladies! Are you starting to feel any changes in your habits or thought patterns?

Just curious. I have.

I feel like God is really asking me to live what I'm learning. I made breakfast yesterday even though I didn't really feel like it. It honestly set a good tone for my day. It was Sunday and, yes, we should have gone to church. We didn't though because we thought we were going to meet up with some out-of-town family for lunch. Even though that didn't happen, I think we just needed some down time as a family. My parents were out of town for the weekend, so it was nice to sort of re-group.

Our passage today is one that represents a daily goal of mine-

²⁸ Her children arise and call her blessed;
   her husband also, and he praises her:
²⁹ “Many women do noble things,
   but you surpass them all.” 

What we wouldn't do to get a reaction from the people in our lives. You know, it must be instinctive as women for us to desire these words of affirmation. If it weren't, I'm sure that we would never dig for compliments. You don't do that? really? (Did you like the lasagna tonight, sweetie? How did you like your lunch today?) Uh huh.. sure you don't. 


The things people say to us really land a spot in our long term memory sometimes. It's the very reason we all remember high school so vividly. The first heart break. Even some of the first reprimands I received as a child (like a teacher expressing frustration with my 5-year old, left-handed self trying to use scissors.) We take it to heart.

I don't suggest indoctrinating yourself to the point you become superstitious about this, but words matter.
Proverbs 18:21
James 3

My challenge to you today is simple- Don't act our desperation to get a compliment. Sometimes we're even willing to put ourselves down just to have someone pat us on the back. Sometimes we can exaggerate our feelings (physical or emotional) for the sake of a reaction. It's scary when you catch yourself doing it!

You are created in His image, even if the person you love doesn't have the concept of "taming the tongue" down, I want you to know that God himself has spoken life over you. Love, Joy, Peace, Patience, Kindness, Goodness, Faithfulness, Gentleness and Self Control all became part of your identity the moment that the Holy Spirit moved into your heart (Fruit of the Spirit.) You do not need to beg for approval from anyone because the result will only be superficial.

This passage says "her children arise and call her blessed; her husband also..." First thing in the morning they get up thinking about their love for this woman, not because she asks them to, but because everyday she is presenting herself as an overall loving, compassionate, selfless person. People like that are easy to love. Instead of us focusing on this as a result, let's decide to be women that people love to love.

I'm an asset, not an obligation-
Lindsay

P31 Challenge: Day 17

I am so loving this. God really does intend for us to put all this good knowledge to use, you know? Probably one of the funniest things I've ever heard a leader say is when he told a close friend of mine, "you're spiritually obese." I am literally laughing now, and I hope she is too if she's reading. It's really true for so many of us that have been under any kind of teaching of the word for a long time. We bounce around from teachings on TV to self help books and then get our weekly buffet at church. Before you know it, you are stuffed with all this information and you're so busy looking for the next fix that you're not even going out and finding a place to apply it all. 

It's the problem that happens to those people we all know (I was one of them) that think they have to spend every waking hour at the church. Even if you're a paid-staff pastor, you have to find time to see the world for what it really is. Lately Allen has been mentioning the way people at work talk about certain things and I'm totally blown away! I'm almost embarrassed that here I am saying I want to reach out to people and yet moral standards for the world are still the same as they were 6 years ago in my mind. In the world, not of it would be my point here. This actually does tie in with what we're talking about today. 

²⁷ She watches over the affairs of her household 

and does not eat the bread of idleness. 

Like any good mother, I get the sense that this one's got eyes on the back of her head. It's the only way to get anything done and still make sure your children aren't going to dive off a table or catapult the baby across the room. 

I really want to zoom in on the second half of this passage, and I will talk more about why in a moment. 

The bread of Idleness. What does that say to you? 

For me it means 2 things- 

Heavy but empty type foods that cause idleness, and 

Food that you eat because you'd rather eat than work. 

A big mistake I make as a mommy is not eating. I usually don't prepare a full meal for lunch because Ira is generally happy with leftovers or something small like soup, PB&J, crackers and an orange or sometimes a few slices of lunch meat. But eventually I hit that point in the day where I really just want to eat. And then I can't stop. I grab something simple like chips or a granola bar because it's easy and before I know it, I'm watching TV and looking for something else on commercial breaks. 

Throughout my study of these passages, I have noticed a recurring theme of selflessness, organization and wisdom. I can apply all 3 of those ideas to my eating habits. 

• Eat just enough to satisfy, don't overfill (that's also called Gluttony, which is associated with greed.) 
• Plan plan plan. I should always have food that is accessible and realistic for me and my family. 
• Eat smarter. I know I can't have a bowl of cereal in the morning. I will drag all day if I do. Recognizing that what I put in is what I'm going to get out of my day makes a difference in the way I make choices. If I put in lazy unhealthy food, I'm going to feel that way all day. 

We are nearing the end of our challenge and the end of the month, so I have been thinking about what's next. I would like to set up a health and fitness initiative (Any ideas for a name?) for the month of March!! I'm sure we're all losing sight of those New Year's Resolutions so it's a good time to reset and remember "HEY! We're almost 1/4 way through the year!" I'm going to be looking into scriptures and advice from all over to get a good grasp of what we need to do. What's realist. What's the balance with a busy life? 

It's time to stop playing victim to a flawed system and make decisions about the direction we want our lives to go. To live healthier is a HUGE one for me. So lets do this!! 

Step away from the cookies! 

Lindsay

P31 Challenge: Day 16

Hey everyone! I just want to encourage you to push yourself these last few days. Sometimes it seems that right when we get close to making a positive change in our lives, those little habits creep back in and fight to the finish. I can say this is true for me right now. I have been adamant about my commitment to these posts, and yet in the last few days it has been a real fight to stick with it. Let's not give in. Let's give more. More to ourselves, more to our families and more to our sweet creator.

I absolutely LOVE today's passage. It does the thing to me that most of the proverbs do. First I feel happy because I think I qualify, through salvation, to be classified as that person. Then I have a huge reality check and feel like there's some work to do.

²⁶ She speaks with wisdom,

 and faithful instruction is on her tongue. 

How often do we just talk straight out of opinion or feeling, without actual knowledge of God's view? 

I've touched on this in the beginning of our study, but we really do have a tendency to have conversations about, say, politics. We will go on and on about our views and what we think is right for "society," and "future generations." Some of that comes from what we know of God's word, morally. But usually the more popular views are those that make us feel good. 

There is a difference between wisdom and knowledge. 

This is what Wiki says about wisdom-

"Wisdom is a deep understanding and realization of people, things, events or situations, resulting in the ability to apply perceptions, judgements and actions in keeping with this understanding. It often requires control of one's emotional reactions (the "passions") so that universal principles, reason and knowledge prevail to determine one's actions. Wisdom is also the comprehension of what is true or right coupled with optimum judgment as to action..."

And here is what is says about knowledge-

"Knowledge is a familiarity with someone or something, which can include information, facts, descriptions, or skills acquired through experience oreducation. It can refer to the theoretical or practical understanding of a subject. It can be implicit (as with practical skill or expertise) or explicit (as with the theoretical understanding of a subject); and it can be more or less formal or systematic."

Knowledge is based on fact. Even someone who does not know God can read the Bible and feel educated about it. 

Wisdom, however, is acquired through overall observations about situations and outcomes. 

I love that the definition even emphasizes that wisdom "often requires control of one's emotional reactions." This is so important. We never make wise choices when we are being led purely by emotion. It's what leads people into additions of any kind from attention to spending to drugs to pornography. Emotions are great when we can use them to relate to others or identify them to understand a need in our own lives. But they can be totally destructive if we are not the ones in control of them, and yes, you do have the ability. fruit of the Spirit

Faithful instruction is on her tongue. 

Let's look at this culturally. This woman runs a business, runs a household, she has servants working for her, she meets the needs of her husband and I'm going to branch out and say that she is also responsible for the education of her children. At least until the boys reach the age where they begin being trained in Jewish law. The girls, though, likely stayed under her instruction until they married. 

That is a big responsibility to take on- Managing people and teaching children.

 It would be preposterous to think that she could just "wing it." The only way to be able to lead others is to first be led by God. We are so fortunate to live after Christ's death and resurrection. That means that we get to consult, not just wisdom, but the Spirit that is living within us. That's pretty amazing. And it really takes the pressure off. 

I'm speaking to home school moms right now! Don't you dare get overwhelmed by your responsibility to teach. Get on your knees, lady! (Physically or metaphorically..) 

Honestly, I won't hold back on this one. Everyday that I have logged on here to write, I read the passage and think "what am I going to say about that..??!" and then God just leads me. I can't explain it, except that he does. On that note, I hope that this is more than just rambling to you. I hope each of you are taking something, anything from this! He will show up. He will fascinate you. He will surprise you.  

It's perfectly reasonable to be organized. It's even better to go in with a plan. 

And as a side note, I don't claim to be perfect at this, but, we as parents need to watch the way we speak to our kids. It doesn't matter if you're frustrated or tired. When we show our children that we are emotionally swayed by their actions, we are teaching them that our love for them is conditional. We also set ourselves up for failure once they figure out how to play us, which starts sooner than we'd all like to think. Even if you have to fake it, treat your kids with dignity, respect and love all the time. They deserve an emotionally safe environment. 

I have heard it said that we have 2 ears and only one mouth, so we should listen twice as much as we speak. I think we, as Christians have another way to listen that's not so audible. When we decide to open ourselves to His instruction, we will have a really hard time misguiding others. 

I'm going to stop talking now- 

Lindsay

P31 Challenge: Day 15

God never lets me get too big for my britches. I fully intended on writing last night, and then the deep fried orange chicken got the best of me (and by that I mean it made me sick, not seduced me.) I laid down to nurse the baby to sleep and.. well... here I am. I should have known. I should have known.


I have been looking forward to today's passage since we started. I didn't know what I was going to say about it, I just knew I liked it.

²⁵ She is clothed with strength and dignity; 

she can laugh at the days to come. 

We have already talked about her clothing a little, but I would like to reiterate that for her, it's not about the clothes themselves. She is dressed in "fine linen and purple," which means she really does give thought to what she puts on herself and works hard enough to allow the absolute best for her and her family. Here, however, we see that she is now clothed with "strength and dignity." It's what people see when they look at her. She's a strong woman. She's a dignified woman. 

I like google's definition of dignified here- "Having or showing a composed or serious manner that is worthy of respect." 

And then the second part of the verse makes sure we see her in full character. Laughing freely at the days to come. 

Can you honestly laugh at the days to come? 

Something that has become all too prevalent in today's culture is to say, "someday I'm going to..[insert change a habit or circumstance here]." When I was younger it was always "when I'm rich and skinny I can do..  blah blah blah." Well.. I'm not going to ever become rich or skinny by waiting on that day to actually enjoy my life. I may, in fact never be rich or skinny! 

The proverbial woman described in this verse is someone I really look up to because I know she is confident in her foundations. She is making wise business decisions, taking care of her family, making sure her hubby can do his job effectively, and taking time to care for herself. It's not a day to day monotony, it's a lifestyle that insures security for her and her family for years to come. Her children will know the best example possible, she will get to see the fruit of all that she does in her grandchildren. 

But she does it all today. Not next week when business slows a little (because we all know, it never slows down. That's just an excuse.) Not when her kids are older. Not when her husband is able to be home more. Today. Without procrastination. 

Training yourself to stop making and believing your own excuses is crucial to your progression in life. It might mean feeling totally intimidated by today, but you will be all the better for it tomorrow. 

Embracing today's imperfections-

Lindsay  

P31 Challenge: Day 14

Hey Ladies! Hope you have all enjoyed your weekend and the extra day off/ with the hubby if you had it. I didn't, but thankfully Allen is only gone for a little over 6 hours a day, so we get to enjoy a lot of time together.

If you're a little backed up, don't worry! Remember that these are being written so that you can take it at your own pace. That said, we are diving into our third and final week. That means all that we've absorbed so far will stop looking like little pieces and begin to paint a complete picture in our minds. I am really excited about that.

Here we go!

²⁴ She makes linen garments and sells them,

 and supplies the merchants with sashes. 

Remember the other day when I said I didn't know what exactly her business was? Now I do. And just to be clear, linen and wool are two different things, so this means she makes stuff for home and then she makes stuff to sell. Busy lady! 

She's got something that people are willing to buy. Not only is she able to interest people in her garments, but she has even found something that the other merchants want from her. What does this say to you? 

Creativity. 

Creativity comes pretty easily to some people. It depends on what your strengths are usually, but if you're a people oriented person, you might be creative with words (like me, I like to write and I would love to get into marketing, too.) Perhaps you're someone who internalizes a lot of things and you use a form of art to express it. Maybe you get creative in the kitchen (and maybe it doesn't always turn out well.. case and point: soy sauce steaks.) 

But there comes a point for all of us when our creative juices just aren't flowing so freely. Sometimes it happens when we have an immediate need or challenge and the solution isn't obvious or enjoyable. It's in those moments that it is totally ok to ask God for creativity! He is Sovereign in all areas, so please believe He can and will send some ideas your way. He's so great in that way, you know? He never changes and yet he's always current. 

A big area where I've really had to ask for fresh eyes is in my clothes. A few years back when I first got involved in ministry, my leaders came to me and said, "some women are complaining that you aren't dressing appropriately enough and they don't want it to be a problem for their husbands." 

Flabbergasted and embarrassed, I didn't know what to do! I certainly was not trying to dress in a way that would cause problems for someone else's marriage. Yet, I had to hear what people were saying and reevaluate. It was a long hard process, starting out by wearing the same black skirt and long, loose jacket every week. Gradually, though, I was able to see things differently, like a man might see it (only by asking my husband, of course.) By the time it I was ready to leave that ministry, I was comfortable wearing jeans dressed up with heels and a blazer/ cardigan. But it did take some work. Letting go of clothes I felt comfortable in, and changing those little things for the sake of others. 

I can't say I have it all down even now, but I do know that when I look in the mirror today, I see something different than what I did 5 years ago. I look in my closet and think about interesting combinations. I try to pull it all together, and make it work while looking totally appropriate for my age and my body and also out of respect for my husband. Not out of a legalistic motive, but one of love, I seek approval from him before I buy something. I want to know that he's comfortable with how I'm dressing, too. 

This is just one example of an area where God has given me creativity. Hopefully, if there's an area you feel needs some improvement, He can bring new ideas to life for you too. 

Renewed Every Morning-

Lindsay

P31 Challenge: Day 13

It's 5 minutes until midnight, so I actually think I failed today. Thankfully tomorrow is our day off so I can catch up a little. Busy week ahead! Hubby's b-day is Wednesday so we're planning to do a few things in celebration on top of my other responsibilities, which now include sewing lessons. I have always wished I knew how to sew and things just kinda fell into place when I met someone willing to teach me.

It is a little ironic that I'm just now learning to sew while we're doing this lesson. Maybe God is just insisting that I literally apply the things I'm learning.

Well, lucky for us, the attention shifts to someone else today. The husband.

23Her husband is respected at the city gate, 

   where he takes his seat among the elders of the land. 

Why, in the middle of all these passages about a woman's character, are we drawing attention to her husband's reputation? Because, again, this is written as instruction for a young man. It serves as a reminder to the reader that, to have a wife that is this exceptional, he too must be somebody respectable. 

So, as women, what can we take away from this? 

Definitely not that we need to go throw this scripture in his face and tell him to be bit better of a person... 

What this speaks to is unity. Unity in the home, between a man and his wife. 

Sometimes I get a little head strong. I told Allen a couple nights ago, "you met your match with me, and you just need to accept that." If you know anything about my husband it's that he does not sugar- coat anything. He will totally blurt out exactly what he's thinking, and the most maddening part about it is that he's usually right! The beauty (and sometimes the most painful part) of our marriage is that we bring balance to each other. In the areas I lack common sense, I have my living, breathing reality check. And when Allen fails to see the softer side of things, I'm usually there to interpret what people are feeling or reacting to. 

He is who he is. I am who I am. And it makes us who we are as a couple. 

The trouble comes when the lines blur. When I decide I want to be bold and obnoxious just to prove a point, or when he chooses to ignore all that he knows simply because it feels good. 

What we've read so far, in a nut shell, says, "she gets her work done, and he does his." They support each other in their own ways. Because she handles the home, the children, the cooking, the clothing, the finances- he is able to go, confidently, and contribute. Because he goes and accomplishes things in his community at a high level, he is able to support his family and also govern the home with wisdom. 

Our challenge today is to simply acknowledge and appreciate the characteristics in your spouse that bring harmony to your life. 

Thankful for the know-it-all

Lindsay

P31 Challenge: Day 12

Hey everyone! I'm so glad I have a moment in the middle of this beautiful day to sit and write. Ira and Asher have decided to nap at the same time, and I must say, the house is peaceful right now. I have the blinds open with the sun shining into our blue and grey room and Allen just left for work. I love these moments, especially on Friday when I know everyone will be home the next two days. It is so nice to have a quiet moment to myself.

Our passage today makes me feel girly:

²² She makes coverings for her bed; 

   she is clothed in fine linen and purple.

There you go. Go show your hubby that you need new clothes, because the Bible says it's ok! 

I remember watching John Hagee once (I know.. I'm old school..) and he was talking about his wife and her need for decorative pillows on their bed and all the other things us women like to decorate with. Rugs, throws, curtains, candles. We love it all. He jokingly said, "are we going to be giving tours through our bedroom?!" I always thought that was HILARIOUS, because.. that's what I'm married to. 

Utilitarian is the word I use to describe Allen's taste in home decor. He'd be happy to have bare walls, bare couches, bright lighting and neutral colors through most of the house. I have tried to shake things up a little lately and he finally budged. We bought rugs in December with some Christmas cash, but deep down it was probably for the sake conserving heat in our room more than anything. 

That's just the way women are. We care about what our home looks like. I don't only want to have a clean house, I want a pretty house. 

I don't just want clothes that fit. I want clothes that look nice. I want my kids to look nice, too. 

The men in our lives may joke and tell us we're just being ridiculous by wanting to spend money on these things that don't really matter; but honestly, I know Allen doesn't mind coming home to a house that looks put together and a wife that took a little time to put an outfit together and brush her hair. 

In 8th grade, my parents were in a place where they didn't want me in public school and they weren't sure they could really be home enough to home school me, so I went to a Christian school nearby. It was through a Baptist church and OMG! I had never been in such a rule-happy environment in my life.

Don't paint your nails, don't wear pants, don't do your hair, don't wear high heels, don't wear makeup, don't color you hair, do not pass go, do not collect $200. Is this supposed to represent Jesus or jail time? I can't tell the difference. 

There's a scripture in the Old Testament that a lot of this is derived from- 

Deuteronomy 22

 It comes out of verse 5, but I shared the entire passage for context. When I looks for a title to this section of scripture it fell under "Various Laws." Hmmm..? I don't think those apply to me. 

And then there's Timothy-

I Timothy 2

I am not getting into all of that! I have tried for years to grasp where this comes from, because, to me it just doesn't tie in with who God has shown me that He is. Don't misinterpret that. I am not saying it's not inspired, I'm merely pointing out that I do not feel educated enough to teach on it yet. I will say though, nowhere in the Bible can I find a stance for women not wearing pants (umm... what about women's pants?) or makeup. In fact, in the book of Esther, the eligible women in pursuit of the throne underwent 6 months of beauty treatments! 

Esther 2:12. So there. 

My overall point in all of this is that we need to not feel ashamed for our instinctive nature as women. 

⁹ I also want the women to dress modestly, with decency and propriety, adorning themselves, not with elaborate hairstyles or gold or pearls or expensive clothes, ¹⁰ but with good deeds, appropriate for women who profess to worship God. I Timothy 2:9-10


Even in this passage the Word is not instructing us to not feel pretty, or to not care about our appearance. This is saying "don't make that your identity." Be known for having a charitable heart and being an overall pleasant person to be around. Of course, we don't want to be vain or flashy! But in avoiding that persona, let's not make excuses to be lazy.

The people around us deserve our best. My kids deserve to grow up in a clean home. When I have daughters, they deserve to have me as an example of a woman who embraces her beauty. My husband deserves to come home to the beautiful woman he married almost 6 years ago. So instead of focusing on being a rule-follower, let's focus on being good listeners. Listen to what Christ is really speaking through His word. Dressing like a man means something a whole lot different in our society, and if we are going to reach the world for Christ, we are going to have to relate to it.

And if you need a little more convincing (and another reference)
Our bodies are a Temple of the Holy Spirit. Think about how specific God's instructions were concerning the Ark of the Covenant in the Old Testament Exodus 25-26. Think, also, about the grand churches we build today. It's totally ok to look nice!

Just for the sake of one more link!
Lindsay

P31 Challenge: Day 11

Has anyone decided to be one day behind me? I was thinking it might not be a bad idea. My life is occasionally crazy, so you may have noticed, I post at pretty random times. If you are like me and stay up late for your down time, it probably doesn't bother you, but if you're into some sort of routine...? Just a thought.

I've actually really been looking forward to these passages! There was even a part of me yesterday that wished I could skip over verse 19 and jump into these 2 verses. I'm glad that wasn't an option, though. I feel like God showed me some stuff last night I wasn't expecting.

Today we're doing 2 verses to make sure we don't get behind by taking Sundays off.

²⁰ She opens her arms to the poor 

   and extends her hands to the needy. 

²¹ When it snows, she has no fear for her household; 

for all of them are clothed in scarlet. 

Sometimes when I'm doing little house projects like making a pretty menu or thinking about making a scrapbook, I wonder if it's completely selfish to spend my time and money on these little things when there are people who don't even have a place to call home. 

I consider myself a conservative like most Christians do. That being said, I do not agree with the attitude that impoverished people put themselves in that situation and deserve the that lifestyle until they get up, get a job and contribute. I can see why people think that. At the same time, I disagree with helping the needy being the government's job. 

I believe that, scripturally, Christ has a heart for the poor. As the physical representation of Christ on Earth, we should have compassion toward the poor as well. 

Reading this brings me some peace of mind because I see that the Proverbs 31 Woman cares for those less fortunate while making no apologies for her financial success and stability. 

It's a concept that a lot of "prosperity" teachers manipulate to make Christians feel inadequate, but truthfully, we cannot be help others without the means of helping them. Sometimes that comes from understanding God's word and sharing the hope of Christ. To someone in need of basic things like food and shelter, however, having the financial ability to help is probably more relevant. 

When it comes to her family, the Proverbs 31 Woman has no problem clothing her family with the very best. There is no double standard here. By caring for her family, she is showing others what they have the potential to be by living a disciplined lifestyle. I don't know a better way to show someone hope than to let them see what God has done in your life. It's not about being flashy, it's about being real with people. 

I know one day I will be able to tell someone, we were living on very little and had to give up our house to push forward, but God took all of our short-comings and turned them into something beautiful.   Just that thought stirs up so much gratitude, don't you think? 

Thankful for Provision- 

Lindsay

P31 Challenge: Day 10

10 days! that's a nice round number. That means that we are about half way through week 2, and I must say it's flying by!

Today Ira had a play date, and Mommy got a little social interaction out of it. It was nice to reach out a little and be somebody to talk to for someone who needed it.

I am so grateful for God's word and the freedom He brings through it. Sometimes we try to compartmentalize our Spirituality as just one part of our lives. Peace in life comes, though, when we apply God's reasoning to all areas.

I hope this study is helping. It sure is helping me.

I'm honestly super tired today! (Just being candid here.) Why don't we get down to it, yes?

¹⁹ In her hand she holds the distaff 

   and grasps the spindle with her fingers. 

I just had to google that. Don't judge me. 

All you really need to know is that it relates to spinning wool. 

So we already know she's a business woman. She makes a profit from her work. She works long hours to juggle it all. Now we learn that she makes her own stuff. We are going to go into this more in the next couple of days, but when I read this my immediate thought was "she's confident in her abilities." 

I don't know what her business is, but I think it's important to recognize that she is weaving/ sewing/ knitting things for her family. (You can read ahead a little, it relates.) proverbs 31

It seems to me that she is not concerned with simply trading her merchandise for someone else's, but rather supplying her family and community with necessities. I want to go back to the beginning of the chapter and draw attention to something. 

Check this out- 

³ Do not spend your strength^[a] on women, 

   your vigor on those who ruin kings.

 ⁴ It is not for kings, Lemuel—  not for rulers to crave beer, 

   it is not for kings to drink wine, 

⁵ lest they drink and forget what has been decreed, and deprive all the oppressed of their rights. 


These are teachings directed at a young man, soon to become King. Teachings concerning what type of woman is fit to be a Queen, perhaps.

Any woman can cook or clean or take care of children, but these passages relate to a type of character that distinguishes her. This reference in verse 19 is not exception. She doesn't need to buy things from other vendors, she can make her own. That's her way of shining a little brighter than the average woman.

Here we see that we, who are in Christ, are Heirs. Heirs to the kingdom of God! That means Royalty!
Romans 8:17

Today's challenge is to do something above average. Maybe that's making an entire meal from scratch. Maybe treating your Hubby like a king. You know what you're capable of that you've consistently chosen not to do. Today- do it.

Princesses are entitled. Queens earn their place.
Lindsay

P31 Challenge: Day 9

First off, I have to apologize for such a late post!

It's Valentine's Day which, for me, entailed catching up on sleep because Ira has had me up about every 2 hours for the last few nights, then cleaning the house like crazy and preparing for a nice dinner at home. And then we ended up going out. Also, in light of the fact that Ira hasn't slept through the night in probably over a week, I omitted his nap today completely, so that was 2 hours of peace and quiet I didn't get. But here I am. I made a commitment and I'm determined not to let you all (and myself) down. No excuses. 

Today's verse has nothing to do with Valentine's Day: 

¹⁸ She sees that her trading is profitable, 

   and her lamp does not go out at night. 

You know what I admire about her? She's a business savvy lady. 

It doesn't say "she delegates her responsibilities and learns that her trading is profitable." It says "she sees.." 

I wasn't sure if this reference to "her lamp" not going out at night means that she stays up all night working her business (which, in context, makes sense.) Or if it refers to the luxury of her lamp literally not going out. As to say, she brings in enough of a profit for her family that they do not have to be conservative with their candles. 

So I looked up a commentary, and it pretty much eludes to both: 

 "She is careful to fill up time, that none of that be lost. When day-light is done, she does not then think it time to lay by her work, as those are forced to do whose business lies abroad in the fields (Psalms 104:23), but her business lying within-doors, and her work worth candle-light, with that she lengthens out the day; and her candle goes not out by night,Proverbs 31:18. It is a mercy to have candle-light to supply the want of day-light, and a duty, having that advantage, to improve it. We say of an elaborate piece, It smells of the lamp." commentary

By the way, this is pretty interesting to read through. There is a school of thought, apparently, that believe that the from verse 10 on these are NOT quotes from King Lemuel's mother, but rather a poem used for instruction because the verses are written in such a way to represent letters in an alphabetical order. Hmm? 

From the time I was 15 until the time I had Ira (which was about 6 years) I worked. Maybe not always full time, but I did work Monday through Friday and my days ended at about 6pm. I would cram all of my housework into the hours I was not at work or busy with ministry. Weekends were my time to catch up on things. 

It was a total adjustment for me when I became a stay-at-home mommy. It's really weird at first because you feel like you have nothing to do all day because you're so used to doing it all at night. And then, after a while, the days kind of blur together and you feel like you don't really have a clock-in, clock-out kind of schedule. Maybe I get a little down time when the babies are sleeping, or while I'm nursing. Maybe I have to stay up after everyone to get some time to myself... But my work is never finished. It's a 24/7 kind of thing. 

In accepting this as my role, I have found a lot of peace with it. So maybe I'm up in the middle of the night because my son needs me then. Maybe I'm up at 5am ironing a shirt for Hubby. Maybe I don't get to shower until noon. But it all works out. God gives us rest. And He gives us enough hours and enough patience to make it until then. 

It would be easy to say that I'm up at almost midnight writing because my day got hectic, but maybe God just wanted to make an example of me :) 

Her lamp doesn't go out at night, she gets her stuff taken care of with a good attitude and she knows what's going on. And if she can do it, so can I. 

Burning Brighter-

Lindsay

P31 Challenge: Day 8

On the 7th day we rested! (Or caught up, perhaps.) Either way, we're ready to dive into our second week of this study.

I spent yesterday doing some fun stuff. I know I already showed you my cloth diapers. I had been planning on using cloth wipes as well, but I hadn't figured out a system yet. Yesterday I decided to look up some info on what other people do, and here's my solution (yes, pun intended.)

These are the ingredients I used: 2 Cups of Chamomile Tea (1 bag), 1 Tablespoon of Baby soap and 1 teaspoon of baby oil. The Baby Bee stuff smells really REALLY good :) 

Here are the tools I used to spruce up my little wipe-container.: Scissors for sizing the paper (which is not shown, but you can find cute paper at any craft store.) A edge punch (I don't know if that's what they're called, but it makes the edges pretty.) Glitter Glue, a Marker (although you could get really fancy and cut out letters or print right onto the paper.) And packaging tape to waterproof the label. 

Here's the final Product! I just used about a dozen hankies and poured the mixture over it. I don't recommend any more than that, because if they sit too long they may begin to grow bacteria and not smell so nice.

I hope you all don't mind me mixing in a little crafty- mommy stuff with the challenge. I feel it relates because it gets me doing stuff that benefits my family. 

Here's our passage for today- 

¹⁷ She sets about her work vigorously;
   her arms are strong for her tasks. 

I like the word vigorously. It's basically the opposite of "sluggishly." How many times do we mope around thinking "ohhhh... the dishes. I'll do them later." We need to realize that laziness is not defined by how little we do, it's the attitude we have about getting things done. 

Let's try that again- You can be a working mom with a full schedule and still have a lazy attitude. 

Here's a definition: laziness definition 

Slow-moving, Sluggish, resistance to work or exertion. 

Hmmm...

Exertion, why! I think that ties in with the next part of the scripture. If you're not willing to exert yourself, you're certainly not going to gain strength. I would love to simply tie this into spiritual diligence Hebrews 6 and talk about things like "running the race," and "loving others." Those things are really important. I don't mean to draw attention away from that, because it's all part of what God desires from us; but I am talking about physically getting up and doing stuff. Pushing yourself. Not giving in the moment you feel a little tired. Not thinking about what you need to do. Doing it. 

I am a person that gets easily overwhelmed. Say, for instance, last week. Our dryer needed repair so it was down for a day. Ha! I love the fact that it was the day after I received the cloth diapers. If that had happened a few months ago, you better believe I would have seriously had a melt down. The clothes would be billowing up and I would be begging for help! But I have really been retraining patterns of thought and I now know that I can get a lot done when I just do it. 

Joyce Meyer posted this on facebook yesterday- "Keep going even if you have to go alone. –Joyce" 

I don't think this means up and leave behind your spouse, but rather to stop making excuses based on other people's actions. One of the easiest excuses in our minds is the fact that someone else isn't doing it. I am so guilty of this right now. Allen and I had started working out together. We were doing good, we even went and bought new matching running shoes. Well, last week he was really tired one morning and decided he didn't want to go. We haven't gone since. I am now realizing that I simply need to set an alarm, get up and go. Not out of spite, but because that's what I need to do. And in not giving into the warm bed excuse, maybe he'll get back into it with me. I hope so :) 

You are strong. You are able. You choose to control your emotions or be led by them. At the end of the day, you know what God is asking of you.  

You do you (but with love, of course)

Lindsay 

P31 Challenge: Day 6

Day 6- We're approaching a whole week! I'm so excited for those of you who are hanging in there. If nothing else, building a habit of getting into the word of God on a daily basis is a HUGE accomplishment. I know that all the social media and links make it easier, but still, good for you. :)

Today's passage is probably one I'm most excited about because I feel it embodies some real girl-power!

¹⁶ She considers a field and buys it; 

out of her earnings she plants a vineyard. 

She thinks about it. She acts on wisdom. She profits from he decision. She contributes to her home. 

This is one of the concepts that inspired me to begin this study. This tells me that a true woman of value does not equal a meek little stay-at-home-mom. 

I remember growing up in a double-income home. My parents both worked, but they also worked their schedules to keep my brother and I home as much as possible. We were home-schooled off and on and neither of us had to endure the horrors of middle school. 

My mom has said that she felt a little out casted by the Home School Moms at the church we attended at the time. Why? Because she worked. 

It's not ok to assume that women who work don't care about their families, or are selfish or too lazy to stay home. Here we have here a biblical example of a woman working to help serve her family the best way she knows how. If you stay home, that's awesome! I do because I feel that I have the ability to teach my children well and raise them in an emotionally healthy environment. But I also feel called to write (hence the blog.) 

To sum it all up, don't limit yourself as a woman. You can make good choices for your family. You can work hard in whatever way you are most beneficial. You can do more than cook and clean and take care of little ones. If there's a dream you have, don't forget about it. I don't mean drop everything now and go chase it, but reasonably consider things that you can do now or in the future to feel fulfillment in that area of your life. 

Still Chasing Dreams-

Lindsay

P31 Challenge: Day 5

Hey everyone! Hope all is going well.

Today I got my order of cloth diapers in the mail! I love them. They are so cute and totally practical for me since I have the time to wash them. I couldn't resist putting one on Asher immediately. I held him up and to see how cute he looked in it and then I thought, "Oh no, I'm one of those moms now."
It really does feel good to know I made an out-of-the-norm choice for my baby because it's better for him, an a lot more cost effective.
 Wanna see?

Yes, that's my finger over the flash. The only problem with these diapers is that they are so cute I don't want to put anything over them. Hence the t-shirt. Moving on-

Our passage today really hits home for me because I am not a morning person. I'm doing better though!

¹⁵ She gets up while it is still night; she provides food for her family

and portions for her female servants. 

Do I think you have to get up before 4am to be a good wife? nope. 

Do I think you should get up at a reasonable time, and help your family get going for the day? Yes. 

If you ever search the word "morning" in the Bible, you will find a ton of references to the morning being a time for worshiping and fellowship with God. Here are some of my favorites: 

Psalm 5:3

Psalm 59:16

I love the Psalms. 

I have been getting up in time to send my hubby off to work well dressed and ready for the day, and for a mom, after he's gone is the perfect time to get some stuff done and spend some time along with God. The babies are sleeping, the whole house is quiet and I love the peace. 

This IS a challenge, after all, so I encourage you to aim to start your day 1 hour earlier than usual (unless you usually get up at 4am.) I have shifted from a 10am morning to an 8am. It feels really, really good. 

Go get 'em, early birds! 

Lindsay

P31 Challenge: Day 4

Day 4! How is it going? usually at this point in any journey, you start to feel tested and tired. I encourage you to keep at it. I can say personally, examining these scriptures and really working at applying them is bringing a lot of harmony into my home. I'm having consistently better days and a lot less stress. It's worth it. I promise. 

 Our passage for today is this: 

¹⁴ She is like the merchant ships, 

   bringing her food from afar. 

After reading a commentary on this passage, I concluded that when it says she brings her food from afar, it probably means Egypt, where corn and bread were more available. I'm going to jump right into what I feel this relates to in my own life. 

Planning. 

A trip to Walmart with 2 little ones can sometimes feel like a sojourn to Egypt, but in reality it's pretty convenient. When this was written, however, there was not much room for procrastination. 

Since we've been preparing meals for 5 people (plush 1 baby) I've had a really hard time knowing what to make, how much, when to start it and then there's the issue of clean up! I told my family that I really just needed to make a detailed menu and shopping list so we weren't eating out so much; and getting frustrated making last minute trips to the store every few days. It was just too chaotic. 

We all threw in ideas for meals that we each would be willing to make until we had a total of 12 meals. We had to be realistic and assume we would go out at least once a week. Then we made the shopping list and a schedule for the who, what and when? I'm really happy about this because it was a little thing I could contribute to really help maintain the peace around here. 

And now I will show off my beginner level craft project: 

Isn't is soooo pretty? I love craft paper. And pre-cut letters. 

My point is that when I finally decided to plan something and stick to it, it eliminated a lot of stress in my home. That's what I'm pulling from this passage, as simple as it seems. Care enough to plan. 

And when you do plan, stick with it. Not by thinking about it all the time, either. That's when we begin to make lots of excuses and turn our focus from what we decided to how we feel. Feelings are good, but not vital to making a decision about dinner. I found the same with exercising (which I still do not have down, but I'm working on it.) just get up and do it. Don't think about it. At least until it becomes a part of your routine, then think about it all day long if you want. 

So there we have it! day 4 and counting. Go forth and conquer. 

Lindsay

P31 Challenge: Day 3

Hey everyone! I'm hopping on here really, REALLY fast. Ira is in this phase where he doesn't like the attention not on him (a.k.a. he's 2.) But he's going out for ice cream with his Am'Ma and Papa, so I have a moment. 

 

Today we're on verse 13: 

 She selects wool and flax 

   and works with eager hands.

The "wool and flax" part had me thinking all day. These probably represent clothing and food for her family. But what I found most interesting is that she "works with eager hands." 

Here's one definition of the word "eager" that I felt summarized it well:

"having or showing keen interest or intense desire or impatient expectancy."

definition- eager

Much like yesterday's study, this comes down to attitude. Meeting the needs of my spouse [and children] shouldn't be something I do because I have to. It's something I want to do. It's something I'm eager to do for them because I love them. 

Hmm... that reminds me of the relationship between Christ and the Church that is paralleled to marriage here:

²² Wives, submit yourselves to your own husbands as you do to the Lord. ²³ For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church, his body, of which he is the Savior. ²⁴ Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit to their husbands in everything. 

Ephesians 5:22-24

If you do walk closely with God, you know that many times there is this undeniable urge to just do the right thing. Not because a Pastor told you to, not because the Bible says so, but because you LOVE God. In experiencing a perfect love with our creator, we can learn to love the imperfect people in our lives better. 

To take the comparison a bit further- it wasn't until Christ came in the flesh that the Word of God began to spread throughout the World. It is God's will that ALL come to know Him, but it took a physical body filled with the Holy Spirit to begin meeting that goal. When Christ ascended, that Body became the Church. 

In the same way, all the plans and desires our Husbands have for our families cannot be obtained without the work that we do. Did I lose anybody there? 

Really! 

It's so empowering for me to know that what I do, be it cooking or cleaning or taking care of my Children is not only important, but VITAL to my home. 

Getting back to work here-

Lindsay